Adaptation - unpredictable changes in circumstance happen all the time
- For a better life quality
Unpredictable changes in circumstance happen all the time, it’s inevitable. Change forces us to have to adapt, but adaptation can be hard for us all. How to adapt was once a mystery for me. To be OK with the change could for me be so oblivious I didn’t even know how to try. How to move on could take hours, tears, and days. Though, I did learn how to be better at adapting.
This wisdom completely changed the quality of my life. I’m now going to tell you how I learnt, but most importantly; what I learnt.
M O T I V A T I O N B E Y O N D C O M F O R T
Lesson 1: Accept the changes without punishing myself for what I could not do.
Some years ago, my daily life and my well-being was ruled by routines, and I struggled adjusting to any change. I needed structure and routines in everything I did, like for example my very important morning routines; making coffee, systematically preparing myself in front of the mirror while drinking it, everything was time limited, perfectly planned minute by minute up until I had to leave the house.
If I woke up at a different time, or I suddenly got less time then I prepared for, it could create a complete chaos for me with major consequences. I had created a schedule for my morning, and my days based on what I felt I needed to do in order to feel personal accomplishment.
If I didn’t manage to keep to my schedule, or something got jeopardized by surrounding circumstances, I blamed myself, punished myself and made myself believe I was a failure and unsuccessful. My mental state was not good. I had no knowledge of how to be ok with change, and how to adapt to it.
I think if you struggle with change as much as I did, it’s important to acknowledge that your struggle is probably caused by something more profound within yourself. Strict routines regarding my daily life were for me the only thing I felt I could be in control of. If I failed in managing/controlling myself and my days, then what could I possibly manage to accomplish beyond that?
Still being very fragile I left my country to go travelling a couple of years back (how I came to dare to do that is a story itself). I left my country prepared to try to be in control of everything I was going to face. But I also left with a motivation in wanting to be comfortable with traveling again.
This motivation gave me a bigger purpose then managing all my routines. I experienced that there is more in this life then my routines, my daily life, my work and my city. My motivation became to experience the unknown, and that made the details of my two-hour morning routine be unimportant to me.
Finding motivation in your new situation is the key to accept the change that have occurred, it might even become preferable. With finding a new purpose I didn’t have the necessity of punishing myself or making myself feel bad for what I didn’t accomplish.
Y O U A R E N O T I N C O N T R O L
Lesson 2: Most changes are created outside of my own control, therefor I am powerless in order to prevent them, so I can only adapt.
You formulate plans based on a visualization of how to complete what you want to do, or what you must do. The plans you make have strong intention and satisfaction in their accomplishment. You feel confident when your plan seems to work out smoothly, you can move forward to the next step in the plan, and you feel good about yourself based on your own progress.
As I mentioned, when I faced this unknown world again a couple of years ago I tried my best to be prepared for every situation that could occur. I would think of all the what if’s, and have all the solutions and plans ready to face them if they were to happen. Like a crisis managing program I was prepared for anything, and it would take a lot of energy and worries to be so.
Today I do not try to prepare for everything anymore, I only prepare for what’s most essential for me to still feel OK with myself in a possible situation. I’ve figured my essential values for my own well-being; 1) I like to be clean, 2) I like to be warm and dry and 3) keep my blood sugar up so I don’t lose my patience.
So, if I’m for instance going on a trip, I would always bring baby wipes and an extra pair of underwear to know I can keep my minimum standard, also an extra sweater and/or jacket -also in case I get cold or in case of rain, and I would keep a nut-bar or two in my bag so I can keep my blood sugar on that level my patience need in case of a situation of problem-solving. And there, I’m ready for anything!
What are your essential values for you to feel OK?
You can try to plan everything perfectly, and prepare for anything. You can try to predict the future and the outcome of the situations and your actions. But for what? For me it has absolutely helped the quality if my life, my own health, wellbeing and mentality getting better at finding a way to simply be OK with change. It takes practice, getting out of you comfort zone, and some self-reflection.
It is impossible to live a life where nothing depends on anything else but yourself. There is always a chance for our plans to be jeopardized, leaving you powerless when it comes to controlling its outcome. It is out of your hands. It depends on someone else. But, what do depend on you, and you only, is how you face it. This gives you the opportunity to practice the surprising and fun side of finding the new opportunities that now lay before your feet.
F I N D I N G S O L U T I O N S O R S O L U T I O N S F I N D Y O U
Lesson 3: A changed situation always create new opportunities
Late 2019 I wanted to bicycle the 2000km long East Coast of Australia, from Melbourne to Brisbane. This didn’t happen. The massive bushfires burnt down most of the coast’s beautiful nature, that caused closure of the roads and forced even the people who lived there to flee from their homes. After the drought came the rain, and with the forests stripped naked, the water dominated the land causing floods.
Accepting the new situation is the first lesson and the first step of being able to find a solution, a new solution that still might be for your own benefit -if not better. Since biking wasn’t a preferable way to travel anymore, which was a change that was completely out of my control to prevent, I could only control how I chose to move on based on my new circumstance; so, I got together with two friends and bought a car so that we could still see and experience this beautiful part of Australia in a safer and faster way.
Biking I could do anywhere at any time, the goal was to explore! This gave me the opportunity to share the experience in company with others. I anyways preferer to share my experience with others, and my appreciation for people surrounding me became an article during this road trip; “Friends are the family you choose for yourself”.It was truly a beneficial solution for me to experience what I wanted to, even though circumstances changed the way I had to do it.
When the big change called COVID-19 hit our reality, my friends chose to end our journey and go home, personally I found a new adventure, in a safe environment, Tasmania. When I came there, the hardships of isolation and lack of human encounters drowned me in sorrow and loneliness. I struggled with adapting to my new circumstances, stay optimistic and to be OK with the world change that impacted so much of my life.
Based on the result of many previous circumstances -that can also just be described as “life”, I ended up being on this specific place at this specific time. Life provided me with a new opportunity.
Lesson 4: Facing life’s mysterious paths with an open mind attracts the opportunities to you.
By accepting the changes and the new situation I found myself in, I could move on and try to adapt to where I was and the opportunities this place could give me. I found motivation to explore something bigger than my misery, which opened my mind to the new possibilities that laid before my feet.
The possibilities I found was the remarkable and unique nature and geology on this island. I fell so deeply in love with it that I realized a passion that’s always been within me, a passion for the deep understanding of nature and the origin of the biology on this earth.
I discovered some great values of mine that I’ve barely lived by before, which have given me motivation for how I want my life to evolve. I ended up living on this magic island for 13 months, a time that made it’s biological footprint within my soul and opened my heart for all nature has to offer, and what’s to be taken better care of.
No matter who you are or how you struggle with change or adaptation, know that you can accomplish to master the ability to see new opportunities. Liberate yourself from the negative impact of changes. It takes practice, challenge yourself with patience and positivity. It will change your life, and I wouldn’t want you to miss out on the surprises life will show you!
For any questions, reflections or personal comments you are very welcome to contact me on Instagram @mofffasa.